ARMISTEAD, calvin wesley

[MAUREEN ST. MARTIN]

calvin wesley armistead

THIRTY | MALE | VERUCA laPIRANHA

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"HELLO THERE, YOUNG GRASSHOPPER. HOW ABOUT YOU INTRODUCE YOURSELF?"

"Young? Whatever floats your boat, honey. My given name is Calvin Wesley Armistead. Call me that, though, and you’ll be asking for trouble. Call me Miss Maureen St. Martin. I’ve been known as her since the year 2000, and that isn’t going to change. I was born and raised in this little town, then got whisked away to New York City the year my name changed. I studied there for four years, play for another four, then moved back here. It’s a long story why, I won’t bore you with it. I am an entertainer and performer at Oxygen, the pay holds me over to where I don’t need a day job. And, honey, before you start making assumptions, I’ll say this; love knows no gender. Let’s move on, shall we?"

"OH, YOU SEEM LIKE A VERY INTERESTING PERSON. WELL, NOW, WHAT DO YOU ENJOY?"

"My performing takes up most of my free time; it’s not all glamour and glitter. There’s booking, negotiating salaries, advertising, making and buying costumes... all the same, I love a good book. The classics or anything by a Spanish-speaking author. I also enjoy cooking and eating what I cook... living alone means that you only have to worry about yourself with that. I’m also a frequenter of the Dragonfly Inn; not only do I love their coffee and cherry pie, but they’ve been more than accommodating to a man in a dress being a customer. I can’t say the same for everywhere."

"NOW, ABOUT THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE. WHAT IRRITATES YOU?"

"As much as I love the whole ‘small town’ atmosphere, sometimes it’s so very constricting. Sometimes I’m seen as a novelty or tourist attraction... I’m a dime a dozen in New York! There are also always those who want to pick a fight for whatever childish reason they can come up with... immaturity is the worst quality you can have, in my opinion. This is why, dear, I’m not interested in many of the men in this town. If they have any sense, they’re too young. The ones my age don’t have any manners. Oh, and I can’t stand people who shove dollar bills anywhere that’s not my hand. Have some common courtesy, please."

"OVERALL, HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOURSELF/"

"Contrary to popular belief about queens such as myself, we’re not all catty, straight-hating wannabe women. You want to know the truth? I’m intelligent, educated, and disciplined. I may perform at a nightclub, but I consider that my art, my chance to let go and the thing I am most dedicated to. Want to talk to me? Have questions about who I am and what I do? Be respectful about it and I’ll talk with you for hours! I’m an open book, baby, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I enjoy letting loose, but losing control is for the stage, not the bar next to it. Just a warning, doll; I’m in control of myself. I know who I am and am proud of where I am now in my life. You challenge me on that in a way that is offensive, and I will in no way hold back."

"OOH, THAT SEEMS LIKE MY KINDA FRIEND. MOVING ON, I'M BLIND. WHAT DO YOU LOOK LIKE?"

"Naturally? I’m six feet two inches tall, with dusty brown hair clipped short and brown eyes. Fair skin with nary a freckle; some say I’m too thin, but it’s all lean muscle, I can assure you. I wouldn’t be able to perform if I was malnourished! If you’ve seen me as a boy... congrats, you’re one of my closest friends. I dress rather casually when not in costume; t-shirts, sweaters, jeans, sneakers... I have a preference for blonde wigs when I perform, my favorite being a long, curly one that goes down to the middle of my back. I’m a wild card when it comes to costumes themselves... whatever suits the theme of the show for that night! When in public and in drag, I try to stay as casual as possible... translate my male style to women’s clothing and you’ve got it, plus my hair tied back and less eyeshadow."

"JUST KIDDING, I CAN SEE PERFECTLY FINE AND YOU LOOK EXACTLY AS YOU DESCRIBED. NOW TELL ME ABOUT YOUR FAMILY."

"My mother is fifty-two years old this May, has been a realtor for as long as I can remember. I love her to pieces, she really gets me. Dad’s a former Marine, now a cop for the township. He and I... well, we get along the best we can. I’m an only child, which is perhaps why Dad isn’t so fond of my career choice... their hearts are in the right place, and I can respect them for that."

"THEY SEEM LIKE GREAT PEOPLE. I'LL HAVE TO MEET THEM ONE DAY. IS THERE ANYONE WHO INSPIRES YOU?"

"Of course. In New York, I was mentored by the great entertainer Miss Helena St. Martin in the Village. She brought me out of the darkness that were my insecurities and made the lady that sits before you today. I owe everything to her, a shame I couldn’t stay in her company longer."

"THAT'S AMAZING. MY DOG INSPIRES ME. OH, DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?"

"But of course. A silver tabby named Minnie. She’s a sweetheart."

"THAT'S SO ADORABLE. I'M NOT TRYING TO HIT ON YOU, BUT WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A LOVER? AND WHAT DO YOU TRY TO AVOID?"

"I thought I said that we wouldn’t bring this up again. Fine. I enjoy the company of a person who is honest, caring, and willing to see past what I do for a living. It can be so challenging to find a partner, male or female, when you straddle both sexes as part of your line of work. As for one-night stands? Forget about it. I’m looking for love and partnership, not a fling. I am, however, a very physical person, even with just my friends."

"HM, I DON'T KNOW ANYONE WHO FITS THAT DESCRIPTION. HOW DID YOU GET TO CRESTING GROVE?"

"As I mentioned before, in case you weren’t listening, I was born here and spent my life here until I was eighteen. I was a quiet kid, but had friends. I never really dated back then either... got picked on for that, but that’s water under the bridge. I studied performance theory and studies at New York University, graduating with top marks. Afterwards... I stumbled. I dated a string of men who didn’t respect any ounce of me, got black-out drunk every night... I was a hot mess, honey. Until Helena, working at a club I would frequent, saw my potential. She took me aside, boarded me in her own apartment, chased those dirty men away, and molded me into the classy lady I am now. I performed alongside her for two years until she began dating another performer. This gentleman, if we can call him that, was not very fond of my staying in Helena’s apartment without paying rent. Most everyone knew we were lovers, but that stopped when that man kicked me out. I was forced to move back here... where I’ve been every since. As of right now, I’m still not certain where I want to go or what I want to do... but performing here is secure and good for the time being."

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ALIAS; mercury.
EXPERIENCE; ten.
HOW DID YOU FIND US; proboards support

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[KELSEY.]